‘Responsibility‘ – to be in a position of authority over someone and to have a duty to make certain that particular things are done.
There are many definitions and interpretations of the word ‘responsibility’, and no matter what, there comes a time when we all have to stand up an ‘be responsible’ or ‘take responsibility, in any given situation.
Take a ‘typical’ family situation. It usually consists of at least, one full time parent but often two. Usually one or both go to work, to make the money, to pay the bills, and someone takes care of the children, or at least organises, child care for the children. With all of that comes responsibility and accountability at some level. I don’t think anyone will dispute that. It seems a simple and feasible scenario. The reality is, that it is not always so straightforward or simple, because we all know, ‘life is simple, its just not easy’ right? That is because ‘responsibility’ is often a ‘Burden‘. The definition of Burden :
‘A load, typically a heavy one’
The ‘breadwinner’ carries the burden of providing for the family, even when they may hate their boss, their colleagues, their job. A parent has the ‘burden’ of teaching, protecting and getting the child ‘world ready’ for when he/she takes his/her independent steps and faces the world on their own. The child has the ‘burden’ of making their parents feel ‘proud’ of their achievements, as this will equal that the parents were successful in their parenting. Or is that necessarily so?
We cannot foretell what the future will hold or how ‘children’ turn out, is strictly down to parenting. Yes it is influenced by it but there is more in the pot than just parenting, in how we all ‘turn out’. It is a mixture of ingredients such as, personality, peer influences, other significant role modelling, intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, self esteem/worth, emotional intelligence to name but a few.
The burden though, is how we ultimately deal and cope with our ‘heavy load’, in all of the different relationships we have with others. This is why, in my humble opinion, I believe we all need to ‘escape from it’ from time to time.
I had my first ever facial when I was 36 years old. I had been laid up for a long time, after an operation on my back . The burden that I felt I was putting on everyone was monumental, especially as I am usually a very active and independent person. I felt quite useless as a wife and mother, being unable to do simple, usual daily tasks. For Christmas that year, my other half, bought me a voucher for a facial. I really didn’t know what to expect, as I had never been inside any sort of beauty salon in my life.
I spent one hour in the salon having my face, cleansed, toned, masked and moisturised to within an inch of its life. The gentle hands of the therapist, the beautiful aromas of the creams and the gentle sound of the music, sent me off into one of the most relaxed states I had ever felt, EVER. I didn’t know, having something done to my face, could do that! I had been laid up for almost a year, slowing getting down and feeling useless, and in just one hour, this therapist worked her magic on me (not just my face) but me, the whole person. I felt wonderful. This one hour allowed me to escape my burden of responsibility somehow. It was like a magic tonic and I literally felt like a new woman coming out of the salon and vowed, like #Arnold Schwarzenegger, that ‘I would be back’.
Not only did I go back, I went back to college and studied beauty therapy, worked as a therapist at a world class spa and then opened my own salon at home, to work around my family’s needs. Stepping away from my usual day to day burden, for one hour, gave me a new lease of life, LITERALLY!
Yesterday I took my mother away for the night to a beautiful hotel and spa #Lyrah. She is a very young 70 something but has some health issues, as you would expect for a 70 something. It’s hard to think of great gifts to get for Christmas presents, so I thought, spending time with her, away from the burden of daily life, would be just what the doctor ordered…… for both of us! Not only did I feel a sense of duty to spend some quality time with her, as my own day to day life is very hectic with teenagers, grand children and work, I could think of no better present to gift her.
We began our day with a delicious lunch in a beautiful setting, had a fine dinner, attended a great show – The Three Amigos’, had restful sleep before our sumptuous breakfast. Next we headed to the spa for a fabulous massage each and a dip in the pool. Of course we couldn’t leave without yet another helping of their delicious food fare and enjoyed a cream tea, a.k.a pot of tea with warm scone, clotted cream and jam……Stupendous!
The moral of the story is whether it be a day at the spa, a walk on the beach, a catch up with your friends or a run up a mountain. Take some ‘time’, leave the burden of responsibility for a short period and Take responsibility for your self and your well being. Spend time, quality time, with loved ones, that you don’t see all the time and step out of that ‘comfort zone’ of the heavy load. Remember, one hour, in the hands of that wonderful therapist, turned my life around. Go on, take the time, you owe it to yourself, to your family and to your soul!