My boy

Words unspoken
Stuck in my chest
Heartbroken
Sting in my eye
Wet rolls down my cheeks
Heartbroken much, unable to speak
The time was today
I knew it was coming
Still not prepared
Arguments going around in my head
What about this or let’s try that
I’m sorry she said, he’s just too bad
I feel it crack and break in two
My heart,
It’s full of love for you
But jack, my boy,
you gave us joy
As you leave us, to run and roam free
We love and thank you for your loyalty
Off you go
To doggy heaven
Heartbroken are we
But you’ll never be forgotten

Jack ❤️💔❤️

The bench

The bench….

The bench it has a year round view
As it stares out at the sea
Taking in the memories
Of all that it can see
It never fails, in fine details
Whether big or small
Memories thought long since gone, now can be recalled
A discreet yet public kind of voyeur
Where people sit and rest a while, as if they had been lured
And if you look upon the bench
Is usually an older crowd
Their mind still full of youth
With a body that’s let them down
But when I sit upon the bench
Looking out to sea
I remember all the times that you too sat here with me
This bench is for your honour
It has an engraved plaque
But how I wish we were young again
And I would have you back.

Today…

One day we going to be dead
I hope it’s not today
Yesterday may have been tough
But you got through it, anyway

There maybe a time when you reminiss
and believe it was the best
And other times you’d rather forget
Days, that you detest

One thing is certain, the end will come one day
That is why the living, must be lived today

Stress and strains are part of life
Which no one can deny
Even when it seems so bleak
Get up today and try

Don’t think about what bothers you
Because that becomes a habit
Look for something beautiful
Go get it and then grab it

It may be a simple roadside flower
That takes your minds attention
The chirping of a little bird
Just singing without pretention

The sound of children’s laughter
Stirs a warmth in your heart
Go seek the things to change your thoughts
To light from the dark

One day we surely will be dead
It will be full of sorrow
Today is all we really have
We’re not certain of tomorrow

So live today as best you can
And fill it with some pleasure
Then reminiss another day
Of memories made to treasure

It doesn’t matter if other people
Have it all together
They’ll be battling a different storm
A different kind of weather

So let’s count our blessings
For surely we have a few
Get up today and start again
Look with a clearer view

Today is all that’s promised
So grab it with both hands
Only you can walk the path
And in your shoes, stand

If you think they’re feeling tight
And squeezing out the joy
Then it’s time to throw them out
And search for the buoy

The one that gives you better thoughts
Of life’s simple treasures
To live today in happiness
Full of little pleasures

One day we going to be dead
I hope it’s not today
Yesterday may have been tough
But you got through it, anyway

There maybe a time when you reminiss
and believe it was the best
And other times you’d rather forget
Days, that you detest

One thing is certain, the end will come one day
That is why the living, must be lived today

Stress and strains are part of life
Which no one can deny
Even when it seems so bleak
Get up today and try

Don’t think about what bothers you
Because that becomes a habit
Look for something beautiful
Go get it and then grab it

It may be a simple roadside flower
That takes your minds attention
The chirping of a little bird
Just singing without pretention

The sound of children’s laughter
Stirs a warmth in your heart
Go seek the things to change your thoughts
To light from the dark

One day we surely will be dead
It will be full of sorrow
Today is all we really have
We’re not certain of tomorrow

So live today as best you can
And fill it with some pleasure
Then reminiss another day
Of memories made to treasure

It doesn’t matter if other people
Have it all together
They’ll be battling a different storm
A different kind of weather

So let’s count our blessings
For surely we have a few
Get up today and start again
Look with a clearer view

Today is all that’s promised
So grab it with both hands
Only you can walk the path
And in your shoes, stand

If you think they’re feeling tight
And squeezing out the joy
Then it’s time to throw them out
And search for the buoy

The one that gives you better thoughts
Of life’s simple treasures
To live today in happiness
Full of little pleasures

She is

She is, greatness, powerful, majestic
She is calm, soothing, raging
She is roaring, still, crushing
She is open, nourishing healing
She is vast, she is essential
She is mother
Where life began
She endured
She failed
She tried
She loved
She is strength
Circumstance gives rise to context
Resilience gives rise to survival
She is all things
Wonderful and despairing
She is stuck, she is free
She is you, she is me
She is us
She envelops us
She is mother

Devoted father

Climbing through the cavity
Pulling cable
A clostrphobe in the making
Still, it must be done
Connections
Power on
New light on the horizon
Sweat and toil
Back is aching
Kango, breaking mortar
Splints break and fall
Bounce off my face like kisses
Tiny scratches
Reminders of what it is all for
Your faces appear in the wall
I smile, determined to carry on
Devoted father
Never falter
Duty bound, honoured
What better purpose is there?
Hands blistered
Heart broken
the cord is strong
No minute wasted
I plough on, for you
My loves, My life
My reason for living
To see you smile,
hear your laughter
To save your hurt
Absent father
Connected always
Til I take my last breath
It was always for you

Carrie © 2020

Devoted father

Umbrella

So very nervous, as he dressed

He felt it was an enormous test

It had been a very, very long time

Since he’d been on a date, to wine and dine

He looked in the mirror, and wiped his brow

What would Katie think of him now?

Only 2 years since she had passed

It was too soon, it was too fast

He had been lonely, there was no doubt

But this felt insane, this ‘going out’

With a stranger, a complete unknown

When he and Katie, for years had grown

And settled down to married life

So proud he was of his beautiful wife

‘go on out’ he heard her whisper

She mustn’t understand how much he missed her

Was it really her he heard or

Was he just being absurd

Then on the screen he heard a bing

It was her, the date,

‘what should I bring?

And how will I know that it is you?

Can I ask, what will we do’?

‘Meet me by the tower clock,

Down beside the river dock.

I am quite tall and a hefty fella

But I will carry a pink umbrella

I thought we might just go for a walk

Take in the sights and well, just talk

This is all so new to me

We’ll take it easy, and just see

If we wish to stay out late

We’ll save it for another date’

Jack

I noticed that my dog peed, as I walked up the hall
There ran a little puddle to see, for one and for all
I felt a little angry that he would do such a thing
Then I thought of all the joy, this little mutt does bring
He’s stinky at the best of times, he’s getting old and frail
Always there though, by my side, his loyalty doesn’t fail
I know his time will soon be up, 6 months, maybe 6 more
I mop up his pee with paper towels and spray the tiled floor.
Not really a major disaster, in the cold light of day
One day when I am old, I too may pee this way
Not in the hall of course, by cocking up my leg
Maybe sitting in the chair or in my bed instead
Whom will I anger, and what would they do to me
If such an accident should occur, will they help me keep my dignity?
There are some things we cannot control, especially as we age
So what’s the point in giving out, or expressing with such rage
Surely that is the time, when patience is required
No one likes or enjoys the effects, when body parts retire
It’s not that it’s on purpose, I see it in his face
He couldn’t hold it any longer, it’s not really a disgrace
I leaned down and patted his head,
‘oh jack, it’s all ok. Don’t worry about this little puddle, it may be me one day’