Relay shun ships

From one life to another, A walk in the park……

Moving to a new place can be scary, disorientating and beautiful at the same time, but discovering it, is amazing….

image, authors own taken @ Tullylacken loop, Leitrim leitrimtourism.com leitrimtourism.com/treasured-landscapes/sliabh-an-iarainn/

It’s not always easy moving. Whether it is moving home, moving jobs or moving from one stage of life to another. Just because it’s not easy, doesn’t mean that it is not good for us, that it is not better for us. Most often it is better to move than to stay stuck. In staying stuck, nothing changes.

How many times do we say, I wish it were different. I wish this was better, he was better, she was better, my job was better etc etc etc. In order for things to change something must happen. We must DO something.

During my life I have moved many many times. From one area to another and from one country to another, more than once. Each time there was an element of pain, washed in with an element of excitement and wonder.

I have recently done it again. I have moved to a different County. For the last 25 years I lived in County Wexford, Ireland, affectionately known as the sunny south east.

I had lived there for 5 years as a teenager too. That was a struggle as I had been a ‘City Girl’, born to Irish parents in the UK. I loved Ireland. I loved to visit my grandparents in Ireland, more precisely. When I knew I was coming here to live at age 14 I was horrified. I was not a County Girl AT ALL, nor did I want to be.

Spending my teenage years here however, though strange, confusing, difficult and lonely at times also had it’s benefits.

In our village, there was one bus a day into town and out of town. It was the school bus and if you missed it, for me, there was no other way into school because my mother didn’t drive and my dad would have already left with the car to go to work. Bonus, if I didn’t fancy going to school any given day!

As I had to leave all my friends in the UK, my brothers and I were allowed to go to the big pub/lounge a few miles down the road. It was a family friendly place and everyone from all over would go to it. It was called the Un Yoke. It hosted many big Irish named bands, like the Wolfe Tones, Joe Dolan, Philomena Begley as well as local bands. We loved it there and, having made a couple of friends on the School bus, went every weekend. It was my salvation from the loneliness.

Fast forward I returned to the UK aged 19 and then bounced back again to Ireland like a y0 y0 25 years ago to my native Co Wexford. Here we built our own house, something we never could have done in the UK. Raised our children, welcomed our grand children and got busy with work and life as everyone does.

The work life balance wasn’t balanced though and then came ill health which if nothing else, puts life into perspective. So Last year I said ‘lets throw in the towel, let’s sell up and go again on a new adventure. There is just us left now, the kids have flown.

Our initial plan was to go to France for a few years and see how that went, but serious ill health put that on hold. So we looked around this beautiful island of Ireland to find the right house, in the right setting for our needs, now.

We ended up in County Leitrim, fondly known as ‘Lovely Leitrim’. When we would tell people we were going there, aghast they would say ‘Leitrim, what the hell is in Leitrim’…….

I was shocked at this reaction. Some would say, ‘the people in Leitrim would move to live in Wexford, not the other way round’.

I agree, Wexford is a beautiful county, full of history and historical sites and beautiful beaches and a lovely quay front to walk along. It is a bustling town with some fab place to eat and drink, but it doesn’t hold the trump card on all that and so I am going to be exploring this beautiful little County in the North West and document just what it has to offer.

It is referred to as Ireland’s Hidden Heartland and I agree, from what I have seen so far, it has truly beautiful scenery, lakes, mountains, trails and even boasts the SMALLEST coastline in a County in Ireland in the little village of Tullaghan https://leitrimtourism.com/towns-villages/tullaghan/

Image authors own at Tullaghan beach….smallest coastline in Ireland

swans at Tullaghan beach, Co Leitrim.. Authoris own photo

Yesterday, my husband and I did our first looped walked around Tulllacken loop. We decided to do the moderate blue walk. We took our time and took it all the beauty along the way. The weather was on our side for the most part, with only a couple of small rain and now showers.

For someone recovering from heart bypass surgery (my other half), it was just what the doctor ordered. The trail was not too steep or too difficult. The views were beautiful across to the snow capped mountain and many many little streams and small waterfalls along the route were a welcome sight.

The rush of the yellow river running by our side was just beautiful to listen to along with the diversity of the tress, the rocks and splashes of colour along the way and also a bunch of curious sheep…..

I welcome our next trek or trail and will post more about the beauty of this beautiful little County.

A sheepish marathan…… authors own image….

Not all those who wander are lost…….

When life feels a little complicated, pressured or tense, there is nothing like seeking out time and space, to find your path…….

authors own taken at Knockranny Woods, Co Roscommon

Not all those who wander are lost,

didn’t you know, the price, the cost?

In walking straight along the line

or veering off from time to time

kneel down upon the steady ground

see whats there to be found

a little bud, a blade of grass

a glistening glow, as the river runs fast

a bird soaring through the sky

announcing to all, as you walk on by

A butterfly, a ladybird

flutter ahead without a word

Follow them all down their path

learn the lessons, see what they’re at

Dancing, singing, merrily

living each moment, so care free

burning passion, awaken desire

fan the flames, set alight the fire

stagnant waters, daily drudge

muddy viewpoints, toxic sludge

waste not time, on staying stuck

take a peek, go have a look

walk and wander, don’t be afraid

the choice is yours to be made

no ties no chains, just faith in now

this time, this moment, knowing somehow

that this path we take, whether short or long

it may feel right, it may feel wrong

but not all those that wander

are lost or found

they’re just where they should be,

now that’s profound

some tread lightly and some will pound

upon this earth so rich in beauty

nature speaks, it is our duty

to harness kindness, patience and love

seek to find of what’s enough

to fill or souls and guide our path

cherish simplicity of all that we have

separate the wheat from the chaff

learn to give, learn to laugh

at all the short comings

that we possess

and know that nature, our mother

knows best!

she gives us valleys, mountains and seas

sunshine, moonlight and a soft gentle breeze

forests so strong, air so clean

protection from bad, seen and unseen

a delicate flower, a thorny rose

the speed of the cheetah and the

sloth on a go slow

balanced she is in all that’s around

and those that respect her are not lost

but found

she takes away our anger and pain

give us comfort when we walk her terrain

negative thoughts seep on out

trust in her beauty, have no doubts

the answers lie within your steps

keep moving forward, have no regrets

or second guessing this or that

make mistakes, it doesn’t matter

get up again if you fall down

look to the heavens at the soft white clouds

see the bird, flying so high

sometimes too, he must cry

but keep on going he know he must

through the wind and rain, the fog and dust

picking berries, and twigs for his home

but before he settles, off he will roam

his simple life, abundant but free

wandering, not lost

but thoughtfully

the trick of the journey is simple but true

but it all has to start

with me and with you

being thankful and grateful

take courage and faith

the path it will open

just walk through the gate…..

No, Not Meatloaf!

When our childhood memories stay with us through our lives, it is often attached to music. A song can transport us to another time…..

And the Bat has rested…… May he Rest in Peace…

I first came to hear of Meatloaf when I was 13 years old and he touched my soul….. I found him, specifically the album Bat out of Hell, to be exciting, deep, crude and and also so romantic that it has to be my all time favourite album, from my all time favourite musician.

I have played this album a million times and continue to do so. I have blasted out his songs when driving, when hoovering, when celebrating and when on my knees in grief and pain.

My kids know his songs, they too love him and I am sure my grand children will come to love him too, through them.

He is a legend and I am so so sad at the news of his parting. If only Heaven could wait and leave him with us a while longer.

I had written a poem inspired by Bat out of Hell a couple of years ago which was published in a Magical Moments publication. The publication included poetry and stories inspired by music. Of course, my big inspiration had to be Meatloaf.

So, Rest in Peace to him. Condolences to his family and fans. He will be a big loss but he has left such a legacy for us all. He will be immortal.

Heroes are remembered, but legends never die
Babe Ruth

Magical Moments – Meatloaf – Bat out of Hell

Promised kisses….

Transport me back to another time

Dance in tune to the perfect rhyme

Youth club days in a purple haze

Beginning to blossom, still reserved,

taking risks and losing the nerve

of going too far, with promised kisses

spinning the bottle and classroom hisses

full of hope yet insecure

will it last, who knows for sure

paradise day and night

crossbar rides, taking flight

now dancing round my living room

hoovering up this adult gloom

beating out my heart is screaming

long lost kisses leave me reeling

warning sirens in my ears

take away my mundane fears

heaven can wait, but oh can I

like a bat out of hell, I want to fly

fly and soar and do it again

by the dashboard light, I will abstain

The minutes…

The Minutes…….

And as times slips by

And they don’t see me cry

They think all is well inside

But the thing is with loss

You pay a high cost

You just bury it deep down to hide

When they’re far removed

From the love that you knew

They don’t understand, they abide

So the tears now are silent

And hidden from view

But all the minutes of the days

Are still full of you.

A dream….

when we long to sleep and dream a new reality….

The dreams, it seems are only hoaxes

That coaxes our imagination

and leads to damnation

cos the dream, it seems

Isn’t real

And you are still gone

like the words in the song

Nothing is quite as it seems

And you are a dream to me…..

Enthusiastic January…

New Years resolutions….. full of hope for a new and better year…..

January, a time of hope, promises and resolutions, whether we say it out loud or quietly to ourselves….. a new year is always a source of contemplation. Before the year ends, we make promises that ‘in the new year’ we will do this, or that, give up this or that, be more healthy, change jobs, give more time to loved ones, give more time to ourselves, take up a new hobby, leave something or someone behind.

We go into the Christmas period with a measure of excitement and a measure of dread, for many and varying different reasons, and some can’t wait for it to be over, so that the ‘new year’ can begin and we can begin, afresh, renewed, awakened.

We look back and reflect and ask, what is it I want to do, to be, to have, to start to end, to give up etc etc. Some years may be the same thing as the previous year and we began with gusto, enthusiasm and motivation, only to dwindle, falter and be left with a sense of failure and nothing more than procrastination in that, next year, it will be different…..

Still, we look forward and we try. Does it matter that we may not complete and accomplish it, whatever ‘it’ may be? Isn’t it the ‘giving it a go’ that matters. Even if that ‘giving it a go’ is to just put one foot in front of the other and make our way downstairs and face another day.

For some people the previous year could have been so challenging, so devastating, so traumatic, that to just do that, go downstairs and flick on the kettle is the biggest achievement that they can muster, and isn’t that great! They did it, they made it, they didn’t give up.

When we pass people by in the street, in the shops, in our places of work, looking ‘put together’ and getting on with life, we assume that all is good, all is well with them. Of course they are all putting their best side out. We are all putting our best side out and for some, it is a real struggle.

So this January, no matter what your path, lets all be enthusiastic, that we made it. We can reflect, we can look forward, but lets not forget to be present, and to acknowledge our own unique achievements, no matter how big or small……

Carnage……

Pain and suffering, especially in grief is sometimes so complex that no matter what you do, you cannot seem to get the balance and so you just have to wait it out……

Sometimes you just have nothing to say, at least not out loud. You have plenty to say, in your head and the incessant talking doesn’t stop. You may want to say it out loud, but you can’t, or you won’t for fear. Fear of letting go of the hurt and the pain and letting the emotions take you on a journey where you do not want to go. Fear of causing hurt and pain, to others because you just can’t articulate it properly without emotions getting in the way and muddling it all up.

Like the force of a tsunami thrusting, pushing and propelling at swift unstoppable speed, relentlessly, ruthlessly and causing so much destruction and damage, but it is impossible to stop it. The carnage it will cause, is unthinkable, and so, you keep it all in, hold it down, squeeze it, suppress and restrain it.

The pain will dull woefully , the hurt will scar deeply , the emotions will become emotionless and as the carnage unfolds within, so shall you carry the burden of being the source of their misery…..

That time…..

A time of good cheer. The one day when all is good and well and the whole world is happy….. right?

Tick tok, tick, tok……….

it’s nearly that time when all should be fun

and children are laughing and no one is glum

where people are frantic and rushed off their feet

presents to buy, people to meet

buy all the groceries, prepare all the puds

get on that list, on the side of the ‘good’.

just stop for a minute and look all around

see whats in front of you, and who’s on the ground

the homeless, the needy, the battered and bruised

no christmas for them, do not be confused

the lost and the lonely, bereaved and bereft

those without faith or an ounce of hope left

so yes it’s that time to share some good will

offer a hand, don’t let time stand still

help the downtrodden, do a kind act

lets stick together, lets make a pact

share out your good fortune, offer it with grace

see dark sad eyes brighten and lift up their face

let the magic of christmas truly begin

open your hearts and let kindness in

teach to your children the magic they have

by accepting indifference to their fellow man

the beauty of giving with a simple pure heart

is a priceless reward and that’s just the start

so yes, it’s that time, to be humble and good

and remember to help all of those that we should

Photo by RODNAE Productions on Pexels.com

don’t beat yourself up or put yourself down

you only can do what your means can allow

the money, the toys, whether small or big

matters not one single jot, cos’ you’ve far more to give

the love in your heart, a kind simple word

a long tender hug lifts up the whole world

the gift of love, is the best you can give

and be thankful and grateful for as long as you live……….

The Power and Powerless

When the powerless is better than the powerful. When time stands still, perspective is key……

There is havoc, chaos and even tragedy in the storm, when the winds are so strong they have the power to knock tress down and knock power lines out too.

Last week storm Barra visited us and we had just moved in to our new home and we brought our grandson up with us for a few days.

This new house has not yet had the gas fire connected or the new gas hob so we were only left with the oil central heating for heat and the electric hob…… both of which do not work in a power outage.

So here we were in the midst of a powerful storm with no heat, no way to cook, no phone or wifi. ‘At least we have a roof over our head’ I said ‘and blankets, food and candles.

We lit so many candles that it created a nice bit of heat and we even tried to boil water to make tea from the candles. We succeeded but it did take nearly 3 hours!

The next day out we went to buy a camping stove and some battery operated lights. We stopped at the charity shop and bought some books for our grandson. One of which was a a book of Christmas Carrolls.

That night, for our entertainment we played the game, eye spy, followed by singing a few Christmas Carols and a game of ‘go fish’.

Had the power not gone, this would have been a missed opportunity. Like most people in today’s modern world, evenings are often spent in front of the TV. Our grandson loves the TV (just like his grandad!) and they both love to watch movies.

I am not saying there is anything wrong with that, it is good to spend time together, whether watching a movie at home or going to the cinema, but I just felt thankful that the power did go and that it wasn’t another night spent watching TV.

My grandson, really enjoyed the games and the singing, as did we. We all had a good laugh playing and guessing the eye spy so much that we didn’t even notice that there was no heating or all the other power filled luxuries that we are accustomed to.

To be powerless, as in having a power cut, can be beautiful. The stars in the sky shone brighter and the moon reflected in the windows and the chatter and laughter in the house was louder. It makes us more connected, more focused and more appreciative of the little things that matter more than all the other stuff. The lack of electricity brought us back, for a while, to a time when, that is how the world worked.

Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t like to be without power like in the ‘olden days’ all the time, but for just a while, it is not ‘just an inconvenience’, it can be beautiful, absolutely powerful to be power-less.

heating the water with candles….. authors own..

singing around the candlelight….. authors own….

Home = House, Place, Feeling?

what makes a house a home or who says a home is a house? Is ‘home’ a building, a place or a feeling?

Almost 3 months ago I received this card from a friend, and it was a lovely surprise to have something posted through the letterbox to my new address.

From actually getting the keys, to moving in to this new house, however, was 3 long months. So much has happened in those 3 months.

This house was to be a fresh start, our ‘grown up’ house, as the children have all finally, flown the nest and we had outgrown our ‘family home’ or it had outgrown us!

At the time between selling our family home and getting the keys for the new house my other half was waiting to have major heart surgery. He had the surgery 10 days after getting the keys and is recovering, slowly but surely.

We were worried and anxious about the surgery beforehand, which is normal, I guess, but one day before getting the keys to the new house I received the devastating news that my best friend had terminal cancer and her time was very short,

This news superceeded everything else going on in my life, including my other half’s surgery.

She was due to come here, to stay here, as she lives in another country. I was looking forward to her coming, to seeing her, as it had been two years since we last saw each other in person due to Covid and restrictions.

This will never happen now. We had been friends for 45 years. We were like sisters and her death, two weeks after being given the news of her cancer, has had a profound effect on me.

When you think of people you go through all the memories, the shared moments and experiences. I visualise things and see her/us together in all sorts of places, school, shops, holidays, hospitals, pubs, clubs and our homes. It makes me smile and it is a bitter sweet feeling, knowing that I will never see her here, in this new house, this new home that I am trying to create.

When I left my old house, I said, ‘it is just a house’ the memories come with you, and they do. So ‘home’ isn’t necessarily a house is it? In creating and decorating and getting this house ready to live in, I take all my memories with me from all the people that I love. My family and my friends.

The day I came up here, after my other half had his op and my friend died the ‘New home’ card was on the mat in the hall. As I opened it and walked into the living room there, flying around was a butterfly. To me, it was my friend waiting for me and greeting me, letting me know, that she was there.

The first thing I did when I did move in was to plant a tree for her and to put up some garden ornaments and tree spinners, to create a garden in her memory, somewhere, where I can sit and talk to her and make new memories in this home.

The sadness of grieving her is still there, but I have to carry on and continue to make this house a home for my other half and I and for our children and grandchildren when they come and visit.

I think it is the people in our lives that make a house a home, whether they are with us, near us or have passed over across the great divide. So long as we love them, cherish them and feel blessed to have them beside us and in our hearts, then we can feel at home.

Even though I have moved away, to a new area, a few hours drive away, this ‘grown up’ house will be made into a ‘home’ while we count our blessings for the life and health that we continue to have, and we will welcome old and new friends and look forward to discovering this new place, that we can come to call home.