They are words that are said and used alot. All walks of life, in everyday conversations. I was angry, I am hurt. I was angry so I hurt him. He hurt me so I got angry and slashed his tyres!
She hurt me so I pushed her. My boss upset me so I came home and kicked the cat!
Anger can therefore invoke an action, a loss of control and a harmful reaction.
Hurt is the pain, like a wound, an ache, invoking a sadness, a physical pain or emotional pain.
When someone is angry, usually, there is an underlying emotion which triggers the anger, the loss of control and to get to understand the anger, we must look to the source of the emotion or feeling triggering and driving it.
(In)security, (in)feriority, (in)adequacy, (un)worthy , fear, frustration, exclusion, isolation:
These are but a few words that can trigger anger or indeed hurt because the two are often married together. Simply put when someone is angry it doesn’t mean that they are not hurting. When someone is hurting, it doesn’t mean that they don’t feel angry. they can also happen separate from each other. The real power, is what do you do with the anger, do you react to it by losing control, or do you take control by unraveling it and peel back the layers to see what indeed is driving it.
When we are hurt physically, as in, have an injury we have to usually rest to help to recover the injury, otherwise the injury may never recover and heal properly. If we are hurt emotionally, the same can apply. ‘Rest ‘the feeling. Acknowledge and recognise it. Let it lie, let it be quiet, let it scream and cry, let it heal. Make yourself absent and don’t react with anger, for then, you are out of control. Process the event which caused the hurt, understand how it has affected you and call it out. Know the damage it has caused and feel the scars it has left whether it can be repaired or not. Take control and use your hurt as a guide to get you back on your feet and back to recovery. Don’t let the hurt make you a victim, let it teach and empower you
During our life we have to hurt and feel pain and we certainly get angry at some point or another, sure as night follows day. What it ultimately boils down to is how we manage it, how we value and protect ourselves. There is a saying that in order to give love, you must, first of all, love yourself. In loving and valuing yourself first, you can then decide to be in control of how you respond to the anger and the hurt that you will encounter on this life’s journey.
As the title says, life is simple, its just not easy! But no matter what, keep it cool and stay in control!
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